It seems like no matter how hard I try, I just cannot get the house clean. I work so hard at it daily, still spending time with the boys and there's always more stuff to do. It's quite depressing sometimes.
Kevin and I had wanted to invite family over and have Thanksgiving dinner at our house, but that's not going to happen. No one wants to come to our house. Kevin thinks it might have something to do with our house not ever being clean. I just started crying when he said that. I just keep falling short. Others have their spouses to help out in the cleaning the house up department, I don't. Kevin just can't do the things most people can and it makes it hard. I have so much to do with no help.
I'm lucky to keep up on the laundry and dishes. Maybe one day, I'll be able to master it, but for now, I just can't seem to do it.
4 comments:
I'm glad to hear I'm not alone in feeling as though I can't keep up.
That's not to say there isn't value in a clean home--I know where you are coming from. I'm not really one to give advice (have you SEEN my house???) but when I'm overwhelemed, I accept the fact that my ENTIRE house won't be COMPLETELY clean ALL of the time. For example, on Mondays and Tuesdays, I do laundry. If I can do more, fine, if not...then I feel good knowing I did what I had assigned myself--laundry for a family of 5. No easy task! Wednesdays and Thursdays I teach piano so I know it's not realistic to expect much more from me then providing 3 meals for my family and spending time with my kids. So the only two things I "assign" myself is to clean the bathroom downstairs, dust the downstairs, and to make sure the kitchen is tidy (no dishes out, etc.). Fridays I clean the bathrooms upstairs and sometimes if I'm feeling super ambitious I tackle washing sheets. Saturday mornings I vacuum the house and dust upstairs. There are times when I think, "I'd rather have two major cleaning days where I do it all at once" but for myself, I personally can't commit that big of a block of time to cleaning. So I break it up into pieces. I find that at the end of the day, as long as I've "checked" off my daily assignment, I don't feel guilty if I didn't do anything else. I'd much rather spend that time with my kids or time on myself, taking a nap when they nap or reading a book or checking my email. Am I selfish? A little. Am I lazy? Probably more than a little lazy. Are their houses that are cleaner than mine? By far! BUT...I tell myself that we aren't dirty people. My kids wear clean clothes and for the most part my house is picked up and over a week's time, everything gets cleaned at least once a week. Take us or leave us, but that's the best I can do. And yes, sometimes my toilets go two weeks without being scrubbed. YUCK! But their MY toilets and if they have gone unscrubbed it's not because I was slacking--something important must have come up that was more urgent than the porcelain throne. So be it.
I definitely feel for you as I'm sure your sweet husband does what he can, but is naturally somewhat limited, thus putting more onto your shoulders. Don't get discouraged! Remember that we only have to do our best--that can be frustrating when we feel we are giving it our all and yet the outcome is not as much as we'd hoped. But in the eternities, it won't matter how often we cleaned our carpets. What WILL matter is how we treat people, if we made time for our children, if we set a good example for them, if we made our spouses a priority. I know enough about you to know you measure up to these things, and more!
Thanks Hope! I really appreciate that. I'm just having a rough day in the cleanliness department. Just a comment I found out my MIL made to Kevin on more than one ocassion got me down.
I have to second what Hope said. I think we all have a hard time keeping up with all of the demands life puts on us. We just have to prioritize what is really important and take care of those first letting go of the other things if needed. Though I love a clean house, it isn't usually #1 on my list of things that are important to me and things that are going to make a difference in my life and the lives of those around me. Don't be so hard on yourself Tami. You are a great person and you are doing a great job!
I completely agree with Hope that having our house cleaned will not matter in the Eternities.
Yet by nature we women's self esteem is in the home (something we sometimes can't help) Men's self esteem is in the providing of the family (work, service, etc.)
I feel for you and hope that you do focus on what is important (Family, The Gospel, Our Savior, improving of one self). I also hope that this awesome website can help out with the cleaning.
http://flylady.net/
By the way that Advent video is awesome! I know... I'm really late at posting this.
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